Walker Bockley
The Economic Similarities
The villagers in the book Things Fall Apart and the early natives to sierra lone share many common aspects, but one that is especially similar are their shared economics. Both the regions seem to have the same economic advancement and both farm in a similar manner.
Both the tribe from the book and the mende people native to Sierra Leone shares the same fundamental farming economy both the cultures farmed for the same things such as, millet, yams, and vegetables. The importance of farming and life, that the village from the book even had yam festivals and often sacrificed to the god of the yams. Another thing that both these cultures share is that they both have leaned to use iron, the Mende people first discovered iron by 600 C.E, and the people in the book have even made guns.
These peoples shared a common way of life they both farmed for the same thing in the same ways, they both valued the same things and they both had the same level of technologic advancement.
Citation
Chrisholm, Alistair. “Sierra Leone.” The Oxford African American Studies Center
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Hi,
ReplyDeleteFirst, I liked how you put a date into your piece; it put events into perspective. I also think that your topic sentence is very nice; it states what your going to be talking about well. I think you could have improved your paragraph by adding some more evidence, or maybe expanding on the existing evidence. Good job!
-Anna
When I indulged myself within the literary confines of this piece, I concocted a conclusion regarding the manner in which you organized your thoughts throughout the paragraph. As you compare the distinct similarities between the two peoples, your ideas are outstandingly clear. This very much enabled me, as an observer, to comprehend the point that you are attempting to enlighten us Literary Observers upon. I applaud you in this regard. A detail that I believe may have the potential to either exacerbate the integrity of these immensely logical theorems altogether, or merely improve them a smidgen, would be to perhaps further support your logical fabrication with the use of direct evidence; thus eradicating any possibly plausible quandaries that the observer may have logically formulated when reading this literary analysis.
ReplyDeleteBest regards,
Luke
Walker,
ReplyDeleteI appreciated your concise points and your ideas were clearly stated. Yet, I am a little confused as to where your quote from Things Fall Apart is? Also, maybe next time expand a little more on your ideas since they are very thoughtful. Other than that good job!
-Ayluonne
Your three paragraphs were to the point. You cold have inproved your paragraph by including geography. Both countries are on the west coast of Africa.
ReplyDelete-Joe
Hey Walker,
ReplyDeleteI loved reading your paragraph.
I think something that would be helpful would be to add a few more detailed facts, and quotes that give good evidence about the facts. Be sure to put a good topic sentence keeping the reader interested. Above all, nice work.
-Morgan
Walker,
ReplyDeleteYour paragraphs(s) were really concise, and they focused well on your thesis; they didnt go off on tangents. This really helps the reader focus on the topic at hand, while not being overwhelmed by information
Good job!
-Andreas
Hey walker,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed reading this. Overall, I thought it had great point, but I thought that there were some statements that were a little too broad: " they both valued the same things and they both had the same level of technologic advancement". You should mention how these two aspects are similar but not exactly the same. Once again, great job.
-Jonny
Hey Walker,
ReplyDeleteI thought you had a strong topic sentence and conclusion which summarized and related back to the beginning. I do think that using evidence from TFA and siting your evidence from your research would help make your paragraph stronger. I think that also expanding on your ideas would help make your paragraph stronger, but your paragraph was concise and clear. Great job!
-Kathleen
Walker,
ReplyDeleteThis is a very good piece of work, it is well written and concise. You give a lot of detail about the products and your explanations are great. The only thing I would like you to change is the length of writing but otherwise it's fantastic.
-Nidalia
Covers main ideas well but is lacking detail.I would also try finding a quote in the book to help you out
ReplyDeleteGreat job walker! You got your point across and put under the microscope the similarities of these two peoples, despite the large time difference between them. Overall, great. Be careful about spelling and capitalization,like "sierra lone" in the first paragraph, and broad statements like "they both valued the same things". It could use more detail, but it is and extremely good essay.
ReplyDelete-Harry Sherman